Confessions of a Confused Atma

Topic 1: Morality..!

Topic2: Objectivism and Communism

Topic3: Go out..Make a choice

[Too much rambling, read at your own risk!]

Ranjana posted something on the topic of morality almost a year back (LINK). She posted it again on Facebook last week. She had mentioned that it is a puzzle over which she had lost sleep many times over. One of her friends had commented that it is indeed a baffling puzzle for mankind. When I think about morality, I think that whatever actions are right, then it is moral. So, what are those right actions. Is an action weighed on the basis of virtue it carries. A story is there in an Indian epic that a man was punished in his after life for telling the truth which caused a man to his life. The story like all the epics mentions ahimsa(non-violence) as the most sacred dharma (it can mean righteousness, virtue, religion etc). But the motto of Republic of India is “Truth alone triumphs”. Well that is an irony there.

Let me look at two philosophies which lies at two ends of a spectrum. Objectivism and Communism.

In objectivism, self is the supreme. Personal happiness along with rational self interest is the supreme goal. Everything is based on sensory perception and logic. It discounts God, compassion to fellow beings and service. Selfishness is the purest virtue. There are other points in her (Ayn Rand’s) philosophy, but I am discounting those for the sake of this post.

In Communism, Marx along with Engels propounds a version of socialism in their manifesto where he calls for the word “WE” instead of “I” as ridiculed by Ayn Rand in her “Anthem”. Marx states communism as the final stage for society, he argues that property is common, and there should be no divisions based on class, race etc. And only state controls everything. Many details of communism were not properly explained as how to function as an individual (Actually there is no individual according to communism). Many questions and concepts are not explained as what about possessions, what about family. The important question I have is about identity! Communism also ridicules the concept of God. A concept which was supposed to be of a worldly influence with no state nations doesn’t answer those basic questions.

I don’t believe in either of the concept completely. Communism was written almost 150years before by twenty-something guys in a scary proletariat environment. Objectivism took shape in a woman’s mind in her early twenties almost 80 years back, she had spent her early life in Russia, a scary communist world[behind the iron curtain]. She adored freedom which she lacked in that country, she adored individuality which was sinful in that country. She wrote her controversial and influential books after immigrating to US.

The first and major reason I detest communism is because, I don’t believe everyone is equal. Period. Whereas the first and major reason I hate objectivism is that I don’t believe(and think) self satisfaction is the ultimate goal, though I consider myself a bit self-centered.

I believe every life’s goal is to learn something. People call destiny as something path breaking, saving mankind. Bullshit. I believe it is to increase the level of consciousness one has by learning something simple. To reach the consciousness of being one with the universe. Few people get the glimpse of that and and has tried to explain it in variety of ways.

But the question is what is a virtue and what is a vice? Anything which is not harmful to a third person and beneficial to anybody’s knowledge is a virtue, and whatever else is there is a vice. Sheesh. Was it that simple? I doubt. One of the hardest thing to do in a man’s life is to make a decision, to make a choice, that is why I go for instincts, if the choice is good for one second, it has to be good for ever. It doesn’t work always. And the decision making process which are emotionally draining and hard have only made me stronger. As Nietzsche quoted and similar to Kanye west’s song “What doesn’t kill me only makes me stronger”

The decision making, the choosing a path is a struggle, just like every learning process, one has to struggle to learn core values, forgiveness, compassion, courage, truthfulness, honesty. The list goes on. I cannot present any tangible proof to the statement which I made. Ha Ha. Nobody can even figure out what causes one human being to posses these qualities. Chemical ‘imbalance’? I don’t think life is just to enjoy it completely. Life is to enjoy those small moments which makes us weep. Life is to enjoy nature, life is to enjoy nurturing. Life is to enjoy a piece of beauty. Whether that is, whether a red or  yellow tulip, a ripple in a pool, an innocent smile, a heartfelt hug, a simple “thank you” card. If life is to enjoy all these things. Won’t life be perfect and complete with complete enjoyment. I doubt. We have different seasons, only the presence of winter can make us realize the value of spring. Only a dry throat can sense the fulfillment a glass of water can provide. Yin and Yang. I would happily take the sadness for those moments of happiness. Even when amrita(eternal nectar) was being churned out of ocean, it came only after Kalakoota Visham(Poison). Rambling again!

But morality which springs from societal demands are also very much valid (not always, it is dependant on cases, you know just like everything else). I am not preaching to accept and swallow whatever society bullshits down your throat. But understand the difference between milk and water and make a smart choice. Go out..make a choice.

-Santhosh K Ramachandran

P.S: I started writing this when I was confused about lot of things, and I am finishing writing having a mind with clarity and having made a choice, but I liked the title “Confessions of a Confused Atma”. Hence the title.